Mooch told me "McKay, at night- this store is yours. This is your store and I will back up with anything that goes on on your clock. If anyone gives you any problems you show them the door, and if they don't leave you call the police, I will back you up 150%, no questions"
And the only thing i heard was "at night the store is yours" . . .
TONIGHT THE STORE IS MINE!!
It is now 12:56am, and i have stumbled upon wireless internet. . .Thank goodness for the wonderful world of technology. It may just save my life tonight, that, and the raspberry crystal light.
My first grave shift. My first night to experience the wonder of the gas station night life.
Oh crap, a big burly guy just came in. . . he has a marijuana leaf tattoo on his arm. . . and now two creepy mexicans just entered the store. If RaVoe only knew. OH if RaVoe only knew!
But i ain't scared! Juje taught me a hold I could use, so if they try to get me i can hold their arm in a very cruel manor. . . . that will teach them.
It is now 1:45. The Hostess man is here. . . .he is the only living thing i have seen since the Mexicans left. (that's not counting the growth of mold i found under the nacho cheese drain.)He just handed me a half open hostess cup cake and said i could throw it away and he would put it in his computer thing and get us some new ones. . .Boo-ya! looks like I get breakfast.
2:14 A chatty guy named Taven just left, he bought some beer and told me "I've never smoked before, but i am SO bored. . . what cigarettes do you enjoy?"
"What?! you are starting to smoke out of boredom? do you know what an expensive habit that is?"
So i talked him in to taking up rock climbing, and recommended a rum flavor cigar and not a the smokes.. . . I'm changing the world, one late night bum at a time.
He told me that he would come back in sometime to "say hi". . . and we all know that in late night gas station lingo that means "I'll come back and shoot you with my stolen hand gun"
But again. . . I ain't scared.
3:36 I just shot No Fear Supper Energy Supplement up my nose. . . not by choice,i am wide awake and don't need energy, just cleaning the fountain drinks gone wrong. . . . Have you ever shot an energy drink up your nose? it stings like a mother. . . The floor is mopped, i cleaned the hot dog cooker and all the fountain drink nozzles, the coffee machine is clean and i re-stocked the beer and tabacco. . . . there is no one here. . . no one but TI and Justin Timberlake. . . it is raining. . I opened all the doors, it smells good. And now i wait. . . wait until six then i can cut lemons and brew some coffee for the early birds. .
4:15. . . I think i am the only soul who is alive in Logan. . . what if the swine flue got everyone. . . what if time froze for everyone but me. . . . and i am trapped here never to see anyone again. . . i wish i had a water balloon launcher and some water balloons that i could try to bomb the 7-eleven. . . tomorrow i'll bring my bottle rockets.
4:50. . . My stomach is really feeling that hostess cupcake right now. . . . why did i think that was a good idea
?
bored.. . . a little tired. . . i wish i had someone to talk to. . . where is co-worker Evan when you need him?
I'll be home soon. . in my bed soon. . . . one hour fifteen minuets.
7 comments:
Oh how i love your ways to cure boredom...for what it's worth, the phone is right there...and you already know, I'm a night owl...and...we can swap stories!!!
You know, who has the most 'interesting' clientel? Who can sell smokes the fastest to the youngest? What's the best fake ID. So, graveyard shift eh? There's a reason they call it that...soon you'll be so pale and dead to the world you will understand the mind of a zombie...fingers crossed!
Funny!
funniest shiz I read in a long time.
This sounds really sucky, I'm tired and my eyeballs hurt just looking at your pictures-(shutter)I could never do it, you are a soldier of the night.
Boredom is a sign of satisfied ignorance, blunted apprehension, crass sympathies, dull understanding, feeble powers of attention, and irreclaimable weakness of character. - James Bridie
you can work on the meaning of that tonight. then let me know what you come up with.
Oh, boy. This made me want an adventure so bad.
I laughed so hard at the late night gas station lingo, I need to hang out with you so you can make me laugh extremely hard. Too bad you live all the way in Logan. Dumb!!!!
Hahahaha! This would make a GREAT reality show! Thank goodness you found the internet! I am glad you are so tough & brave. I am SURE I would not hold up as well you do. Ya know, they should have another graveyard worker there, so you at least have someone to talk to. Do you work this shift every day/night now?
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