MEXICO

I just got back from the worst vacation of my life.

I was with a quick witted group of people that were constantly making me laugh, my stomach still kinda hurts.

We camped on the beach witch means that I had to fall asleep to the soothing sounds of the stupid waves. And the stars were so bright- I got motion sick from all the shooting stars.

At one point in the trip I was forced to climb out the small back window of a truck forcing me to lose my head band and my dignity. All for the love of a surf board.

I acquired a Texan stalker.

The dolphins kept trying to show off while we were eating out dinner.

Then they us to this orphanage where not only did we have to look at orphans we had to touch them too.

I thought the trip would take a dramatic turn for the best when the boy I was walking around mexico with stopped to ask for some Viagra, only to find out he was not being serious.

Then leaving mexico of course we can’t just drive straight home, NO, that would be too easy. We had to stop at Disneyland of all places, and if I see another grown man wearing donkey ears I’m going to throw up.

I could go on forever- I was shoved in a cave with water up to my knees, my bed was set up in a rotting beehive where the only way I could sleep was with one eye open, I placed my life in a psycho’s hands as he turned on some snoop dog and tried to bring me as close to as he could with a “mild” offroading adventure. I was balled up in the back of the truck being forced to witness two boys singing and dancing like they were freakin Freddy Mercury himself.

I don’t know why I continue life when it treats me this way.

If anyone would like to join me in ending there life I know a vast veranda that’s not to far.